I was right

So an afternoon in Moorefields Eye Hospital can confirm that my tumour on my optic nerve has been bleeding. I'm back home and feeling fine except for lack of sight in my right eye and oh, the broken toe. I mean really, I was defending myself from a surprise attack from a dying bee and kicked a wall, it bloody hurt.

So back to my eye.

I know nearly as much as you do.

But I'll worry another day. today, ouch my toe...

eye eye

I just left a message with Moorefields eye hospital asking for my man to contact me, because the last few days I've had a dark streak across my vision in the eye with the tumour on the optic nerve. I've been here before of course. remember the toe... nothing came of that and if I blogged about every twinge I had I'd have gone mad by now and pissed a lot of people off. But I had that feeling tonight, one of oh well, could be worse.
I started to plan for an operation. I'm thinking, well it is slow at work and i'd rather be fit and healthy for the summer when I can spend some time with my little girl. I think it all became more obvious when We went for a bike ride and I turned to check that no cars were coming and I had to turn a lot because I couldn't see.
This streak has been there for a few days, i had an eye infection and it got gunky for a while but it isn't now and there is this streak. Now I feel stupid, now i'm thinking I bet it is nothing and you're going to waste more time and more tax payers money. Oh shit... I wish I had a medical degree, I hate this because I didn't mention my arm to anyone for months and it turned out to be a real, 'got to get it out' tumour.
Better safe than sorry?
Arrrghhh.

who am I

My dad is still alive, and I'm glad of it because maybe he wants to be alive. But his desire to end it all has made me wonder who I am. I feel like maybe I'm an expert in getting on with it. I thought I was an expert in VHL and I am in my own way but. I don't know what I'm saying.
I'm glad to be alive, I live a very good life.
I have so much.