Depression

I'm not depressed today, I'm just really pissed off.
But I think I was, I think that the feeling of despair was one that took me over.
I think I was depressed because the joy of life doesn't last when you're depressed.

It's like sunshine on a cloudy day, you feel it but never enough to actually keep you warm.

The sadness that covers you, that creeps into each day.

And then I get really cold, that way you don't feel anything. I've just been lying here and knowing that I'm just not feeling. 

It's easier. It hurts less. It means I can move through each day. 

My husband loves me... I think he'll always be there if I need it want him. I really hope that that is true. 

And so tonight I don't want to sleep because I don't want tomorrow.