A strange week

I feel so sad and a bit worn out. I think I may have under played how bad my dad'sa health has become perhaps not. What I haven't said is that he doesn't want to be here anymore and so last Tuesday he tried to take his life. Here in England that is illegal and so when he refused to go into hospital (my mum found him) they had to threaten to section him. You have no doubt realised that he didn't manage it, he didn't take enough even though he thought he had taken more than enough.
So 4 days later I have left his side and come back to my home and I don't know if I will see him alive again. He wants us to get on with our lives despite knowing he hates his. So I told him I loved him and that I would see him again. I wouldn't say 'goodbye'
So where does that leave us?