If you let it, it would never stop

Near death, or worse, near potential rubbish ruined life, tends to lead to a cliché of visits, trips, striving forward... I'm no exception. At least at first.
Right back on path. A path I always had the wisdom of saying "at the moment" at the end of my expected career outcome of Head Teacher.
But last year was horrible.
I've never felt so unhappy in my job. I've felt unhappy about some people I've worked with but I've never felt that unhappy at the whole job.
Right now I'm not sure if I can pull apart why and what parts made it horrible. I see by writing that down that it's not one thing, it's all the bits.
But day 4 into the new term, having taken the step back, it feels better. Knowing I don't have to work twice as hard and I'm still making a difference. I'm better physically, well as much as I can expect, emotionally I'm not there yet. A year ago I was feeling terrible, I kept trying to win.
So determined to win that I nearly lost everything.