didn't bother

I went to bed early, I didn't bother with it. I am feeling low and worried about the year ahead. I haven't been able to book my MRI here and all I see when I look on the various types of media is the NHS crashing to the ground. 

I will probably have to book a trip to SA to get it done. I don't want to do that. 

I woke up several times in the night. The worries of the year ahead looming large. 

I have a list of what ifs I can't seem to shake. 

But I'm lucky enough to have rolled over to my husband and I told him and I cried. And he understood. I know that overall we'll be fine. We just will. White privilege and a healthy dose of affluent parents. But I'm just feeling so gloomy about 2023. 

We're leaving our safe haven and our escape from the harsh reality of all that the UK holds. 

I know I'm bored quite often, but I've had so many years of craving that, I'm not going to let it go easily. 

I also need to see a dentist. 

Urgh.